Saturday, June 13, 2009

Soul Searching

Well, it's been more than a year ...

Why do I blog?

Well, actually that's an easy one. I started blogging for reasons no more aesthetic and therapeutic than making some extra money for a cup of coffee, Starbuck's hopefully. But, as they say, making money IS an art, and I guess there's nothing more therapeutic than watching the bank account grow, at whatever rate. Still, after having been blogging for more than one year now, I'm no more an artist in this artistic category than a child holding a crayon in front of the wall of his parent's bedroom; and I am probably in need of therapeutic treatment more than before I started blogging.

However, during the time spent on blogging, another interesting question arose.

Why do I write?

Well ...

I write, therefore I am.

No idea what the heck that means. But I've always wanted to say it - so cool - and felt an urge to complete the incomplete hanging sentence: I write, therefore I am ---- a frigging giant pen?

Now, why do I write?

Actually, I did not realise this question even exists. But after more than a hundred posts in a year time, I have to ask myself this question - where do I find the interest and passion to continue this words-ridden, previously unthought of pastime for so long?

I was never into writing; except for newspaper, neither was I into reading. That is why this question is so intriguing. The quality of my written works aside, the satisfaction and pleasure I find flowing within me during and after the process of writing was indeed a pleasant surprise, and still is.

Facing a screen of whites, I would turn my attention to the ocean of choice, take a deep breath, concentrate and plunge into the sea of thoughts. At the point of entry, millions of thoughts would come rushing by. I would wait until I'm floating weightlessly in the middle of it all, clear my mind and pluck those that can be threaded together. After some careful consideration, I would build them into carriages of words, and complete the train of thoughts. Work's not done - tracks need to be laid. Smooth turns, unexpected twists, rising tensions, free-falling rushes, enchanting tunnels, brilliant flashes ... and Voila! A ride is created.

In actual fact, the process is less easy than as described. For me, the process has to be repeated probably ten to twenty times to complete a decent piece. But that's just made the finish product so much more gratifying for me.

When I lay the process out that way, I realise maybe it is not the writing that I enjoy.

I appreciate creativity, in whatever shape and size. Creativity fascinates me. I admire creativity.

Perhaps, it's the creativity behind the writing that really enchants me. Or perhaps I am simply enjoying the process of creating a post. But is there any difference between writing and creating a post? Certainly.

I get as much satisfaction from a piece of more than 1000 words as a piece with no word!

In essence, after some soul searching, I think I can conclude that I write, because I enjoy creativity. Writing is but a means to an end.

But there's one very important element in my enjoyment of writing - YOU.

Would I find the same pleasure with a pen, a piece of paper, and a piece of writing that ends up in my locked drawer? I very much doubt so. I blog, therefore I write.

For whatever reason I'm enjoying writing, I would probably do it for a while longer, hopefully a lot longer, in this blog and my other blog.

Yes! I've actually started another blog half a year ago to house the lighter side of my creativity in greater frequency, and to earn some more coffee money (if you haven't already noticed this at the sidebar of this blog for the last few months).

Of course, there's one obstacle in my pursuit of this fulfillment - time. With works and family commitment, time is hard to come by and when it comes, I have to struggle with fatigue from work. Sunday is the most productive day for me in this pursuit.

Still, for now at least, I think I can say that I do enjoy writing, and will explore more ways to satisfy my desire for creativity in the future through writing - fiction, "faction", short stories, long stories, random thoughts, etc, etc. So, bear with me.

I hope you enjoy my writing as much as I enjoy the writing.


There - another train is built, another track is laid, enjoy the ride!

Well ... try.



Aron Sora said...

This post reminded me of a lecture by Tony Robbins, every human must give back to be fulfilled This idea is from this lecture

Mitzi said...

I have always enjoyed reading what you write. Very creative indeed plus you can learn a thing or two or three or hmm let's just say much much much... here i go again. Lots of things. There it's shorter but it fits.I look forward to more post.Take care and more power giant pen. heheheheh

maxivelasco said...

i never realized before that one can earn through blogging. it was only four months after when I knew about that possibility which is of course, something i grabbed... like what you've said, it's nice to see the bank account growing rather than the other way around.

you write really neat, nice and so easy to comprehend. i hope i can write as good as you.

anyway, hope we can exchange links, too!

Toothfairynotes said...

well, this is my first time on your blog, but I already enjoy reading it! It's fun and interesting to read...


lina said...

I've always enjoyed reading your posts even if I don't comment much (or at all).

Empty Streets said...


Dropping over to thank you for dropping by over at empty streets and wishing yah a great weekend ahead :) xoxo

The Fearless Blog said...

Very interesting post...a dialog with yourself that allows you to brainstorm and reach a conclusion..I like it.

For me writing is also "a means to an end." Writing allows me to express thoughts and feelings that I probably could not otherwise do with the spoken word. I have met several writers in my lifetime, amateur and professional, and they have one thing in common. They better than they speak.

Writing, for me, is like a small traffic free back road that curves through the mountains and along the side of a river, always open and always one to hurry me and no one to follow. The road belongs to me and my destination infinity.

Thanks for the ride my friend...truly enjoyed it. :>)

Bob said...

making some money is why I started my blog to, but first I have to get a page rank.

Buzzing J said...

Aron Sora:
Thanks for the link.

Thanks for the visit. Pleasure having you here.

Long live the Giant Pen!!

Never too late to know what you can do, especially when it involves growing your bank account, eh?

Thanks for the visit. You have an interesting blog too.

Thanks for the props!

Even if you don't comment much, I see your footprint here (ie, your EC card) everyday. Glad you like my posts. Thank you.

Empty Streets:
Pleasure is all mine.

The Fearless Blog:
I'm glad you dropped by. Because, partly, this post is inspired by you.

Remember many, many posts ago in you blog, you asked "Why do you write?" and I was given less than 2 seconds to come up with an answer?

Well, after many, many, many days, and many, many, many thoughts later, here it is. I know, I'm slow up there.

Perhaps I'm not a writer, but I do convey better in written words than spoken words. As I said, I'm slow up there.

Always enjoy having you here :-)

All I can say is:

It came silently, and mysteriously.
I don't know what I did, neither do I know what I didn't do.
But it's here (it was missing for a few weeks recently though).
I just hope it's here to stay, and grow.
Because I won't know what to do, or what not to do to keep it here, and grow.
I'm just glad it's here.
My Page Rank, that is.

If I can assume I know what I'm doing is right in the direction of getting a page rank, perhaps I can give this advice - traffic to your blog, and comments on other people's blogs.

Hope it helps.

dana said...

I just fell into your blog and it's gonna leave a bruise. I've been blogging for 8 years. I just love to think, but I had no idea how many thoughts I had until I started blogging. Which also proved how many useless thoughts I have. And I love to type.

Buzzing J said...

Gosh! 8 years!!

It's an accomplishment just to think about it.

Hope my posts will soothe your bruises a little bit :)


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