Dear Jane,
It rained today, the sort that reminds me of you - soft as feathers, cool as the mountain streams, and quiet as the night: the fall of the raindrops, the embrace of the air, and the rhythm of the rain. Sitting in the campus cafe, sipping my morning dose of caffeine, I kept waiting for a girl to emerge from the morning crowd of young adults walking to their classes.
Yes, I went back to the university today, had a walk around the campus and took a stroll down memory lanes. So much has changed.
When the rain started, I took shelter at the cafe - the cafe where I first saw you, and had my breath taken away in the drizzling rain. There I was, having my morning coffee before class. Just as I raised my eyes to check my watch, a girl dressed in white shirt and blue jean appeared amongst the umbrella-wielding crowds. What captivated me was not only your angelic face and the innocent smile it was wearing, but your drenched hair, your bare feet, and your joyous steps in the rain - such energy, such innocence, such carefree spirit! Such lunatic!! That's what I thought about you then.
I also thought that love had never come to me so fast. Not before. Not since. Perhaps it was the heavy cloud of solitude that accompanied me at that time - a lonely soul in a foreign environment stepping into a new life - there's no wall of resistance strong enough to defend against the attraction exuded by your free spirit. That's probably the heaviest and fastest crush I had.
Because of you, or the desire to see you again, I got to know the owner and the waiters of that cafe. I still frown upon the stinginess of the owner for not giving me discounts for my coffee, after the many cups I bought to wait for your appearances for many weeks after that. After so many years, the owner of the cafe has changed, perhaps many times over, so has the price of a cup of coffee. But I was still listening to "our song" on my iPod.
... there must be an angel playing with my heart ...
Eurythmic, remember?
I'm quite sure that's your favourite. In one of the happiest day of my university life, this song was softly streaming out from the earbuds of your Walkman into my tender heart. The luckiest guy in the world - was my only thought that day, when you walked towards the back of the bus and picked the vacant seat beside me. As you took your seat, you smiled at me. Yes, you smiled. I'm very sure you did. Because my heartbeats picked up speed like a paratrooper who had jumped off a plane without a parachute. And the vigour of it! I thought the whole bus could hear my heartbeat.
As you tapped your finger lightly on your bag to the song, I was trembling slightly like a foolish teenage boy. I so wanted to talk to you then. But I couldn't bring myself to interrupt your song. To my delight then, we alighted at the same stop near the campus. I'm not sure you noticed, but I followed you all the way to your class that day, waiting for a chance and enough courage gleaned to tap your shoulder and say Hi! As you know, that never did materialise. The happiest day of my university life was to be followed by the saddest.
Like a puff of smoke, you disappeared into thin air after that day. I have never seen you since.
The agony of missed chances tortured me for a good few months after that. Concocted with the crashes of the diminishing hopes of you somehow reappearing in front of me was the worst feeling - sleepless nights, tasteless food, futile searches, disappointment after disappointment, and, in the end, giving up. Ahh ... the emotional youth and its inexplicable idiocies. Coming out of it, I made a promise to myself.
A promise I keep until today - to never be fearful of taking the first step towards what I want.
These fearless first steps have since led me to my first job, my first sales - now I own a medium size company, my first girlfriend, and subsequently my wife of twenty odd years - she was my fifth girlfriend (yes, the fearless first steps work for breaking up too) - and my three boys - the eldest graduated from our university today - that's what brought me back to the campus, and that's when I thought about you again.
In a way, everything I own today started with those fearless first steps which came into forces because of you. And thus, I owe what I own today to you. You made me who I am today.
I call you Jane, but I'm never sure whether it's actually Jenn or Jean. I overheard someone calling you "Jane" before you entered your class the last day I saw you, and I saw the initial "J" on your bag on the bus that day. Truthfully, I don't remember your face ... So ...
So, thank you, Jane.
Now, if you receive this e-mail today, please do not worry. I'm not a stalker. You have received this e-mail today because your info stated your attendance to the University of St James around the years of 1985 - according to Facebook, and your name is Jane.
I don't expect any reply to this mail. I don't need any reply to this mail. Please don't reply to this mail. I just want to somehow express my gratitude to you - Jane.
Whoever you are, here's wishing you a good life and happiness.
Thank you.
.
Showing posts with label Facebook. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Facebook. Show all posts
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
I Threw Away My Dictionary
Dressed in a smart gi, I took a deep breath, harden my set of ab, letting the qi rise within me, and my id slowly concentrating into a focal point. Slowly I let out a breath from my os. Armed with a da in my right hand, an ax in my left and the moves de ki planted firmly in my mind, I closed my eyes. My ka was strong. I try to sense the approaching od with the sharpest of my senses.
(If you have no idea what I'm talking about, don't worry. I've appended another version with definition of the strange (to me) two letters words in this post.)
And then it happened.
Bo!
Like swimming in an ea of hot aa, my armours melted. Like an ignorant fool facing the wrong direction in the way of a stampede from herds consisting of ky, ai, and zo, my tactics was crushed. It came as ae huge surprise. I never expected what was coming my way. Not ay.
I was amazed, and amused to na end. My ees were wide open in incredulity. I was going like "Oh My Di!" and an aw of exclamaition, "ah..., eh..., er..., ha..., hm..., la..., ow..., st..., uh..., um..., ur..." follow suit, when I saw "IT".
"IT" is the list of acceptable two letters words in Scrabble from Facebook (for some reason, it's not available in US and Canada) displayed in the Dictionary tab. I have no idea which dictionary it's based on. And it's not just the two letters words. Other words that I didn't think exist appeared on the board and were given points. It's almost like I'm bringing a bagful of xu to China to trade, or reading a book with plenty of of pe, pi, nu, mu, or xi.
But I didn't ug it because of my ignorance. Not at all. I enjoy the game. I am trying to ch my vocabulary to banish the wo I suffered in my first game, when I was so not ready. With these new found words, it opens a whole new dimension of Scrabble fun for me. I no longer fear having the tiles of "Z", "J", "X" or "Q" in my rack. Although, I'm not sure how many words that I'll learn can be used in my writing. So, I probably still have to keep my dictionary for verification.
And with this, I announce my entrance into the world of Facebook, albeit with my alternate identity in the blogging world. Yo, the name is Jay Buzz (they don't accept my preferred name of BJ or just J, and there are more than one Jay Buzz in Facebook), I'm a blogging Facebooker, or a Facebooking Blogger now.
Apart from playing Scrabble, I'm not sure what I can achieve through the network, but I'll give it a go. I'll be "friending", "following", and etc. And maybe I'll see ye and ya in there? Perhaps we can have a game of Scrabble too. Oh, do bring a piece of za too, so we can et while we play, ja?
Oh, the ed in my Words program were going hay-wired with this piece. And I swear, for a mo, I could almost hear a siren going off inside my computer when I was typing this out.
See you in Facebook!
( Note: the two letters words in colors are all acceptable in the game of Scrabble in Facebook)
The What-They-Mean Version
Dressed in a smart gi (- loose-fitting white suit worn in judo, karate, and other martial arts), I took a deep breath, harden my abs (- abdominal muscle), letting the qi (- chi) rise within me, and my id (- mind's instinctive unconscious energies) slowly concentrating into a focal point. Slowly I let out a breath from my os (- mouth or mouthlike part or opening). Armed with a da (- Burmese knife) in my right hand, an ax (- axe) in my left and the moves de (- of or from) ki (- Japanese martial art) planted firmly in my mind, I closed my eyes. My ka (- in ancient Egypt - attendant spirit supposedly dwelling as a vital force in a man or statue) was strong. I try to sense the approaching od (- hypothetical force formerly thought to be responsible for many natural phenomena) with the sharpest of my senses.
And then it happened.
Bo (- exclamation uttered to startle or surprise someone, esp a child in a game)!
Like swimming in an ea (- river) of hot aa (- volcanic rock consisting of angular blocks of lava with a very rough surface), my armour melted. Like an ignorant fool facing the wrong direction in the way of a stampede from herds consisting of ky (- Scots word for cows), ai (- shaggy-coated slow-moving animal of South America), and zo (- Tibetan breed of cattle, developed by crossing the yak with common cattle), my tactics was crushed. It came as ae (- one) huge surprise. I never expected what was coming my way. Not ay (- ever).
I was amazed, and amused to na (- nae - no) end. My ees (- eye) were wide open in incredulity. I was going like "Oh My Di (- deus - god)!" and an aw (- variant of) of exclamaition, "ah..., eh... (- exclamation of surprise or inquiry, or to seek confirmation of a statement or question), er..., ha..., hm..., la..., ow... (- exclamation of pain), st (- exclamation to attract attention), uh..., um..., ur..." follow suit, when I saw IT.
"IT" is the list of acceptable two letters words in Scrabble from Facebook (for some reason, it's not available in US and Canada) displayed in the Dictionary tab. I have no idea which dictionary it's based on. And it's not just the two letters words. Other words that I didn't think exist appeared on the board and were given points. It's almost like I'm bringing a bagful of xu (- Vietnamese currency unit) to China to trade, or reading a book with plenty of of pe (- 17th letter in the Hebrew alphabet), pi (- sixteenth letter in the Greek alphabet), nu (- 13th letter in the Greek alphabet), mu (- 12th letter in the Greek alphabet, a consonant, transliterated as 'm'), or xi (- 14th letter in the Greek alphabet).
But I didn't ug (- hate) it because of my ignorance. Not at all. I enjoy the game. I am trying to ch (- ich - eke - increase, enlarge, or lengthen) my vocabulary to banish the wo (- woe) I suffered in my first game, when I was so not ready. With these new found words, it opens a whole new dimension of Scrabble fun for me. I no longer fear having the tiles of "Z", "J", "X" or "Q" in my rack. Although, I'm not sure how many words that I'll learn can be used in my writing. So, I probably still have to keep my dictionary for verification.
And with this, I announce my entrance into the world of Facebook, albeit with my alternate identity in the blogging world. Yo (- expression used as a greeting or to attract someone's attention), the name is Jay Buzz (they don't accept my preferred name of BJ or just J, and there are more than one Jay Buzz in Facebook), I'm a blogging Facebooker, or a Facebooking Blogger now.
Apart from playing Scrabble, I'm not sure what I can achieve through the network, but I'll give it a go. I'll be "friending", "following", and etc. And maybe I'll see ye (- you) and ya (- you) in there? Perhaps we can have a game of Scrabble too. Oh, do bring a piece of za (- pizza) too, so we can et (- eat) while we play, ja (- yes)?
Oh, the ed (- editor) in my Words program were going hey-wired with this piece. And I swear, for a mo (- moment), I could almost hear a siren going off inside my computer when I was typing this out.
See you in Facebook!
.
(If you have no idea what I'm talking about, don't worry. I've appended another version with definition of the strange (to me) two letters words in this post.)
And then it happened.
Bo!
Like swimming in an ea of hot aa, my armours melted. Like an ignorant fool facing the wrong direction in the way of a stampede from herds consisting of ky, ai, and zo, my tactics was crushed. It came as ae huge surprise. I never expected what was coming my way. Not ay.
I was amazed, and amused to na end. My ees were wide open in incredulity. I was going like "Oh My Di!" and an aw of exclamaition, "ah..., eh..., er..., ha..., hm..., la..., ow..., st..., uh..., um..., ur..." follow suit, when I saw "IT".
"IT" is the list of acceptable two letters words in Scrabble from Facebook (for some reason, it's not available in US and Canada) displayed in the Dictionary tab. I have no idea which dictionary it's based on. And it's not just the two letters words. Other words that I didn't think exist appeared on the board and were given points. It's almost like I'm bringing a bagful of xu to China to trade, or reading a book with plenty of of pe, pi, nu, mu, or xi.
But I didn't ug it because of my ignorance. Not at all. I enjoy the game. I am trying to ch my vocabulary to banish the wo I suffered in my first game, when I was so not ready. With these new found words, it opens a whole new dimension of Scrabble fun for me. I no longer fear having the tiles of "Z", "J", "X" or "Q" in my rack. Although, I'm not sure how many words that I'll learn can be used in my writing. So, I probably still have to keep my dictionary for verification.
And with this, I announce my entrance into the world of Facebook, albeit with my alternate identity in the blogging world. Yo, the name is Jay Buzz (they don't accept my preferred name of BJ or just J, and there are more than one Jay Buzz in Facebook), I'm a blogging Facebooker, or a Facebooking Blogger now.
Apart from playing Scrabble, I'm not sure what I can achieve through the network, but I'll give it a go. I'll be "friending", "following", and etc. And maybe I'll see ye and ya in there? Perhaps we can have a game of Scrabble too. Oh, do bring a piece of za too, so we can et while we play, ja?
Oh, the ed in my Words program were going hay-wired with this piece. And I swear, for a mo, I could almost hear a siren going off inside my computer when I was typing this out.
See you in Facebook!
( Note: the two letters words in colors are all acceptable in the game of Scrabble in Facebook)
The What-They-Mean Version
Dressed in a smart gi (- loose-fitting white suit worn in judo, karate, and other martial arts), I took a deep breath, harden my abs (- abdominal muscle), letting the qi (- chi) rise within me, and my id (- mind's instinctive unconscious energies) slowly concentrating into a focal point. Slowly I let out a breath from my os (- mouth or mouthlike part or opening). Armed with a da (- Burmese knife) in my right hand, an ax (- axe) in my left and the moves de (- of or from) ki (- Japanese martial art) planted firmly in my mind, I closed my eyes. My ka (- in ancient Egypt - attendant spirit supposedly dwelling as a vital force in a man or statue) was strong. I try to sense the approaching od (- hypothetical force formerly thought to be responsible for many natural phenomena) with the sharpest of my senses.
And then it happened.
Bo (- exclamation uttered to startle or surprise someone, esp a child in a game)!
Like swimming in an ea (- river) of hot aa (- volcanic rock consisting of angular blocks of lava with a very rough surface), my armour melted. Like an ignorant fool facing the wrong direction in the way of a stampede from herds consisting of ky (- Scots word for cows), ai (- shaggy-coated slow-moving animal of South America), and zo (- Tibetan breed of cattle, developed by crossing the yak with common cattle), my tactics was crushed. It came as ae (- one) huge surprise. I never expected what was coming my way. Not ay (- ever).
I was amazed, and amused to na (- nae - no) end. My ees (- eye) were wide open in incredulity. I was going like "Oh My Di (- deus - god)!" and an aw (- variant of) of exclamaition, "ah..., eh... (- exclamation of surprise or inquiry, or to seek confirmation of a statement or question), er..., ha..., hm..., la..., ow... (- exclamation of pain), st (- exclamation to attract attention), uh..., um..., ur..." follow suit, when I saw IT.
"IT" is the list of acceptable two letters words in Scrabble from Facebook (for some reason, it's not available in US and Canada) displayed in the Dictionary tab. I have no idea which dictionary it's based on. And it's not just the two letters words. Other words that I didn't think exist appeared on the board and were given points. It's almost like I'm bringing a bagful of xu (- Vietnamese currency unit) to China to trade, or reading a book with plenty of of pe (- 17th letter in the Hebrew alphabet), pi (- sixteenth letter in the Greek alphabet), nu (- 13th letter in the Greek alphabet), mu (- 12th letter in the Greek alphabet, a consonant, transliterated as 'm'), or xi (- 14th letter in the Greek alphabet).
But I didn't ug (- hate) it because of my ignorance. Not at all. I enjoy the game. I am trying to ch (- ich - eke - increase, enlarge, or lengthen) my vocabulary to banish the wo (- woe) I suffered in my first game, when I was so not ready. With these new found words, it opens a whole new dimension of Scrabble fun for me. I no longer fear having the tiles of "Z", "J", "X" or "Q" in my rack. Although, I'm not sure how many words that I'll learn can be used in my writing. So, I probably still have to keep my dictionary for verification.
And with this, I announce my entrance into the world of Facebook, albeit with my alternate identity in the blogging world. Yo (- expression used as a greeting or to attract someone's attention), the name is Jay Buzz (they don't accept my preferred name of BJ or just J, and there are more than one Jay Buzz in Facebook), I'm a blogging Facebooker, or a Facebooking Blogger now.
Apart from playing Scrabble, I'm not sure what I can achieve through the network, but I'll give it a go. I'll be "friending", "following", and etc. And maybe I'll see ye (- you) and ya (- you) in there? Perhaps we can have a game of Scrabble too. Oh, do bring a piece of za (- pizza) too, so we can et (- eat) while we play, ja (- yes)?
Oh, the ed (- editor) in my Words program were going hey-wired with this piece. And I swear, for a mo (- moment), I could almost hear a siren going off inside my computer when I was typing this out.
See you in Facebook!
.
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