Thursday, April 30, 2009

Ready?

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1!!!!!!
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Well? Did my blog EXPLODE??


Damn! And they promise it'll Explode ...

Oh well ... Time to GO.






* Probably due to the recent uproars about the controversial paid-ads in Entrecard community, I'm seeing more and more familiar Entrecard blogs in Blogexplosion. Whatever the reason, it's always nice to see familiar faces in different environment.


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Saturday, April 25, 2009

Rainy Comfort

"Strolling along country road with my baby. It starts to rain, it begins to fall ..."

Whenever the rain begins to set me into a relaxing mood, the catchy piano introduction of this oldie will echo at the back of my mind. My body will start to swing ever so slightly to the rhythm, and my heart will slide into the happy grooves of the song. A smile will appear.

Nights are but mere phenomena of earth turning her back to the sun, without days; without the sun, the moon would be no more fascinating than the rock at the feet. One feature of the tropical weather that I really enjoy is the rain. Not just any kind of rain.

The day will start through a morning of refreshingly cool air, a blue sky hemmed with white clouds dotting above the surrounding mountain ranges of greens. As I walk into a day as lively as this, a deep breath in will do wonders to the mind, and to life. Energized.

As the sun works itself into the middle of the sky, the clouds will follow suit, and slowly make themselves prominent by pressing heavier towards the earth. Oppressive - is the only description for the heat as I work through the day sweating, the fan being my only cooling device. As evening rolls into the day, the sun will punch its card, as I do, on its way out down the west, and the dark heavy clouds will give in, eventually. Torrential downpour.

The biggest raindrops will come down hard, striking furiously against the roofs of building and cars, sizzling vapour will rise from the scorching surface of the roads, and water level of the drains will overflow. The rain will be so loud it will be the only sound audible, drowning all thoughts with its furore. Within instants the tropical heat will be flushed away, and the air will turn cooling.

"Without an umbrella we're soaked to the skin. I feel the shiver run up, my spine ..."

By the time dinner is finished, the rain will have eased into a drizzle, soft as feathers. The air will have cooled further into the night. A deep breath in will do wonders to the mind, and to life. Peaceful.

The sound that is as soothing as the rain then will be the sweeping fan. The duet of the dropping rain and the humming fan will be joined occasionally by the clicking beats from my keyboard, as my creativity takes a pleasant stroll through lines and lines of words, painting thoughts in my mind. When my fingers are not dancing on the keyboard, the mouse will take over as my helms, surfing over oceans and dropping by all over the world. As I silently sing and swing to my favourite tune of the rain, heavenly joy.

Although, heaven is not where I would like to check in right now. Not when I have two of the dearest angels doing their homework with their mother knitting merrily in the next room.

"Oooh ... I hear laughter in the rain, walking hand in hand with the one I love ..."

Children's laughter - the only clue I have of what heaven's like.

The occasional laughing outburst from my little girl and her younger brother amid their quiet chat while doing homework is the constant source of my blissful smile. Even their intermittent inevitable bickering could not wipe the smile off my face and chase away my happy feeling. A pond, deep blue and peaceful, colorful ripples, in the gentle rain, is my happy heart.

"Oooh ... how I love the rainy days and the happy way, I feel inside ..."

~

After a week without rain under a hot spell, I miss the rains.







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Monday, April 20, 2009

DUH!!!

It's a good dinner. So good, my taste buds are down on their knees kissing my hands to express their gratitude. It's been a fun day. The kids enjoy the day trip - the driver, not so much. But he's more than happy to see his kids' content and tired faces at the end of the day. Cool night, satisfied stomach, mission accomplished, should be a good drive home.

After a brief chat, the kids have already dropped into a serene silence within 5 minutes. After a day of enduring the kids' excited screams around the pool, their unending complains during the climbs and walks at the temple under the hot tropical sun, the cool silence in the car is much welcomed.

After a short 10 minutes on the receiving end of the sleepy brainwaves transmitted from my wife and two kids, my mind is starting to give in to the hypnotizing effect amid the silence. My head is beginning to remind me of its presence with its increasing weight. My eyes have to keep winking on a more regular basis to charge up my defense and divert the alluring brainwaves.

Since I can't throw the three wave emitting sources out of the car, I try to break the monotonous buzz of the engine a little bit by varying the speed of the car. I rev it up a little bit above the speed limit of 110km/h and then let it drop back a little bit. I lift my feet up slightly from the pedal a little bit, and then press it down a little bit. Up ... then down ... up ... then down. I have never realized that such a driving style would have an effect of a cradle being rocked inside the car. The kids are starting to snore! Up ... down ... up ... down ... up ... down ... down ... down ... down ...

DUH!!!

Okay, under this circumstance, a rocking cradle should be the last thing on my mind.

Music. Kenny G - "Songbirds", "Silhouette" - that should keep my mind entertained. Hopefully it'll be entertained enough to distract it from the sexy temptress from the Land of Slumber. The smooth rhythm, the soothing saxophone, the relaxing mood, they are creating a soft cushion of air around me. Soft as cotton, like the cotton of my pillows, lying comfortably on my bed. Ahh ... my sweet and loving bed. How loving … how nice ...

DUH!!!

Damn. Wrong choice.

Let's see. Yanni is good. "Marching Season" - ahh … nothing like the inspiring, heartbeat driving music to chase away the Goddess of Drowsiness. Fast tempo. Good. Attacking piano. Good. Thumping drums. Good. My spirit is up. My eyes are wide open. That's better. Let's keep up the spirit.

Once is inspirational. Twice is uplifting. Thrice is good. Four times mixes ordinary into good. Five times blends in the monotony. Six times make it sound like … like Kenny G. Seven-times brought out the, the, errr ... the pillow?

DUH!!!

Heck! Seems like music is not going to work either. I have to keep the mind working. Give it some strenuous tasks.

It's a rainy day - hmmm …not catchy enough. Cats and dogs have been dropping like the sky has open the gate of the ponds? The silence of the night was blown away by rain? The rain has announced its arrival in the style of an atomic bomb being dropped?

Time has been short due to work these past few days for me to find some good first lines of a few post-in-progress. A good first line will usually broach a lead for my muse to chase. But without a certain depth of thoughts on the subject, the task is doubly hard. Under the inappropriate mood, the muses are never interested in leaving their stable. Right now, all that's on my mind are "drowsiness", "sleepiness", "pillows", "bed", etc. Hmmm …

Duh!!! Duh!!! Duh!!!

At last, after some hard battles fought and won by the bravery of my mind, and a brief stop along the highway to answer a call from Mother Nature, we are finally home sweet home. There's no better way to make sleep more enjoyable than a night of driving with the mind tired from battling the devil called sleep. Now, the devil will transform itself into an angel leading me to my much desired land of dream on my comfortable bed. But I doubt I'll have any dream tonight.


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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Thoughts Of Innocense

The three of them were wandering in the woods. Their thick clothing made the cold winter morning much enjoyable. The air was still, heavy with the early chill. Every breath of cold air that they drew in was released back into the atmosphere in a puff of light mist. The sky was clear, hindered in sight sparingly by the barren tree trunks that were reaching towards the blue heaven. Traces of the long winter still covered most parts of the woods. Though sporadic spots of green were starting to surface.

"Careful, Samantha!" the old man called out to his 3-years-old granddaughter who had hopped happily ahead of them. She was busy looking for small animals that were as eager as her in welcoming the arrival of a new season.

As the old man walked slowly and quietly with the little boy, he casually asked, "Jack, what is snow after it's melted?"

"Water!" the little boy answered without hesitation, proud to show what he'd learned from his parents.

The old man smiled at the answer and gave the little boy an encouraging pat on the back.

The little girl in front heard the slight outburst from her older brother and ran back towards the two of them.

"What? What? What's that, Grandpa?" she asked, with her big curious eyes looking at both of them, slightly out of breath.

The old man looked at his granddaughter fondly and reached out his hand. As they continued walking hand in hand, he repeated the question, "What's snow after it has melted, dear?"

With a smile as bright as the sunshine in a winter morning, the little girl shouted happily, "Spring!"


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Friday, April 10, 2009

Of Community, Duty, Cash, EC, Ads and Entrecards

I like fences, especially when I sit on top of them. I can get fresher air and a clearer view of the surrounding, not hindered by any emotional walls. Unless it's deeply fundamental within me.

When the paid ads first appeared mysteriously on my EC dashboard and clamouring for approval, I was a bit dumbstruck by the crowd. Still, I approved most of them. Mainly because as part of a community that have brought me so much, I wanted to do my bits to help sustain it. And also because a lot of the paid ads were from fellow Entrecarders who are doing their bits to help.

I like the idea of being able to exchange EC for cash. In fact, I was a bit disappointed last year when they banned the selling of EC in open market. After all making a side income was one of the reasons I started blogging. So, personally, when they announce that EC would be able to be exchanged with cash, I was overjoyed. The hole on my roof was a proof of it. I would like to see this paid ads work too.

While I was doing my bits to help, it didn't occur to me what that means to my EC-paid ads in the queue waiting patiently to make their appearance in my widget. When I read about the unfairness that they were being dealt with in other blogs, I felt guilt. Although I'm aware of the 50/50 air times, the injustice didn't immediately struck me when I was dutifully clicking "Approve" on those paid ads. So, after approving two days of paid ads, I started rejecting all paid ads.

Right about the same time, I stopped buying ads with my hard-earned EC, not wanting to gamble them on uncertain exposures. Also, the waiting room of my approval-seeking EC-paid ads was starting to have echoes. I thought perhaps the EC-paid ads will die a slow death. I read in the Entrecard forum (or blog?) that, having the value of our ads to decrease accordingly is part of the plan, so that more could afford to place ads. And I agree it's not exactly a bad thing. But before that actually happens, what will happen to EC paid ads that are already in the queue?

I would have gone on to reject paid ads silently too, had I not seen a widget pop up in my queue for approval that was paid by EC, much to my surprise.

With that, I felt compelled to cancel all my previously approved paid ads (which I initially intend to let them run their course) and make an announcement here:


My EC widget will be paid-ads-free.



I'm not sure why Mr Langdon started Entrecard. Fame? Fortune? Community service? But I'm grateful that he did. After reading about the necessity to maintain it with paid ads, I started to wonder how did he manage to keep it up before, and thought he must have done a good job with it too. But I guess he's at a cross road now. It's not easy being the leader or the management of any community. But I guess he has some tough decision to make. And doing something controversial for the sake of being controversy might not be the best way to bring Entrecard towards a better tomorrow. And a better tomorrow will sure sound hollow with a smaller number of following. Ultimately, I hope he has the dibs within him to get us, the Entrecarders, to the next level. All of us.

Entrecard, I can blog with them, I can blog without them. But I will be happier, much much happier, if I can blog with them.


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Sunday, April 5, 2009

Don't Leave Home Without It

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Have you ever had one of these?

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Silence.

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Awkward silence, in the company of another?

Not the kind after some untowardly comments are made; but when two people are thrown together into a non-conversation-conducive situation. Especially in a car, when there's no way out.

I used to be very uncomfortable with this kind of uneasy hollow. I often felt a need to break the silence with some verbal exchanges. It seemed strange to have two persons sitting together and not have any communication between them.

Even after a conversation is started, when it starts to circle around the weather, I can already sense the dead-end wall fast approaching. During the flitting comments on the heavy rains or the long dry spell, my mind would start to wander, poking around to find a lead for the next topic. But the more I search, the more frustration I will feel. The more frustrated I am, the less likely I will succeed. In the end, silence befalls. In a car, turning on the radio can shatter the silence, but it will do nothing to ease the awkwardness.

Then I found a way of thinking which would make me feel at ease with these awkward silences.

Friends, colleague or family members, if the other person with me is my senior, I would just sit there, singing songs in my head, planning my next dinner, forecasting the winning lottery numbers, figuring out the order of chicken and egg, etc. I would figure that as the other is the senior, he or she should take the initiative to undo the awkwardness, if there is any. If my senior doesn't stir up the silences, I will just sit there happily doing my mental exercises. Otherwise, a succinct and perfunctory "yes sir" or "no madam" will nicely return the ball to the other side.

It's even simpler if I'm the senior of the two. If I don't feel like talking, you better shut up, junior.

If we are equal, as in the case of friends, it's a bit more delicate. But then, I overcame that too.

The source of the awkwardness under these silences is expectation. We feel awkward when we think there is a need for conversation during these silences. In this case we're assuming that the other person would like to start a conversation and waiting for us to take the initiative. But, that's an assumption. It could very well be that both of us have a common desire in that situation, silence. Even if the other person does want to start a conversation, it's really his right to do so. And we should respect that and let him start a chat in his topic of choice at his own convenience, while we wait, enjoying the silence.

But ultimately, it's about self-confidence and self-esteem.

An adequate confidence in ourselves will put us in a comfortable state in any situation, including these awkward silences. And I have cultivated enough esteem of myself to carry me back straight, chin up and face smiling without any fidgeting in the company of others under most situation. If I prefer silence during these awkward moments, I will be myself, and be comfortable with it. But that does not mean courtesy is out of the window.

With a beaming self-confidence as my front, I no longer feel awkward under this kind of silences.

Self-confidence - look good in it, and never leave home without it.


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Friday, April 3, 2009

A Man, A Bike And Fresh Air

It was a welcomed rain after a hot tropical day of sweat and more sweats. Stepping out of a non-air-condition working environment, the refreshing cool air did wonders to the tired body. It's almost as soothing as a puff of cigarette after a meal - or not.

Driving home with the windows down, my hairs was dancing to the disco song from the radio, while my face was collecting mixtures of dust, dirt and moisture. A surprised find by the road side made me stop my car.

I saw one of my customers, who is also my father's friend, getting ready to mount a bicycle outside his house. Since our eyes met, I stopped my car and got out for a polite chat.

I was surprised because a bike and this man formed a picture that had never appeared in my mind as a match, like an elephant holding an iPod. I know he plays golf. But that's more of a social activity and for the excitement of the side betting. A bike just seemed "too healthy" for him.

The chat lasted for quite a while, during which he talked about the cooling fresh air after the rain; how it was really refreshing to have a ride around the neighbourhood; how cycling was preferred over jogging as it's easier on the legs; how he would be out of breath easily by jogging; how he needed more exercises as he grows older, etc, etc.

I was totally absorbed during his speech. But I only vaguely remembered what he said.

All those time during the exchanges (if you consider me nodding incessantly and uttering "uh-ha, uh-ha" to the rhythm of "That's The Way I Like It" as one end of an exchange), I was observing how he could smoke out his wise words with both his hands on the bike's handles, and never attended to the smoking cigarette dangling from his mouth.

He huffed, he puffed, he squinted his eyes, and the ashes would drop off from the cigarette as the cigarette kept bobbing when his lips moved to speak.

Finally, he mounted his bike. I waved goodbye, admiring how he could maneuver his cigarette like a natural extension from his mouth.


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