Saturday, March 6, 2010


My children teach me a lot of things in life, the 'truer' things in life, the better things in life, the real meaning of life. In reverse, I do not, or seldom, not that I know how. I find that as a parent, I don't really 'teach' my children regarding life, I instil values in them - values that I think are important and should be adhered to, values that I think might be of any beneficial value to them in the future, values that might turn out to be as valuable as the poop we step on when getting out of a car.

I recently took my 8-years-old boy to the optician and got him a pair of glasses, reluctantly. He'd been complaining about not being able to see what the teachers write on the board in school. Knowing that his near-sightedness is hardly caused by over-reading or over-studying, and most probably by excessive TV or Gameboys, I was a bit upset.

My 10-years-old daughter had the same problem last year, but we managed to avoid the spectacles by teaching her how to relax her eye-muscles when looking at blackboards in school or doing homework, or watching TV at home. She had managed to shake off the slight handicap, proven by her eye test when we took the boy to the optician. So, I tried to teach the same trick to the boy.

I tried to explain to him how to relax his eye-muscles when looking at things from afar, how not to strain his eyes, etc, etc. All in vain. He doesn't know how. Time and again I would catch him squinting his eyes in front of the TV. Then I thought of a brilliant idea, or so I thought.

"If you see it clearly, you see it. If you see it blurry, leave it be. That's looking at things in a relax way."

Well, he didn't get that either. I still catch him squinting his eyes in front of the TV. I was frustrated. Then it struck me.

Perhaps this little fella is trying to teach me another lesson in life. Could it be?

Here he is trying to get a clear view of the world, and yet I ask him to "if you see it blurry, leave it be". It suddenly dawned on me that maybe there might be something fundamentally wrong with what I'm trying to 'teach' him. Suddenly I have doubts regarding my mentality on looking at things. I'm still not totally convinced that I'm incorrect, but I have doubts.

My children teach me things, but they are not necessary good teachers. Like in this case, I think I'm getting a slight hint of what this lesson is teaching me, but the boy hasn't given me any further explanation ... unless ... unless he's trying to make me think!

This little fella is trying to make me think! Instead of laying it out clearly to me, he's given me a lead and make my mind dwell on it.

Hmmm ... what's he trying to say? What's this lesson in life about? Is this another lesson in life?



bing said...

that it does not help letting a problem be unsolved?

Buzzing J said...


But I would have thought it's more on our perspectives on what's happening around us, rather than problem solving.

Mary Leedy, Mentor in Training said...

hmmmm, I think the boy just needs glasses. The world has so much beauty to see, he shouldn't lose out on any of it. :-) I'm sure there's a lesson here, but save yourself time and brainpower by helping him see better, then figure it out.

Buzzing J said...

Don't worry, the boy got his glasses.

The world is beautiful. Just not sure whether insisting on seeing all the things clearly all the time in all the places is the best idea ...

Johnny Ong said...

like this blogpost piece. def it's the value but the kids will also learn from our daily actions / vocals of which i'm not doing well

Anonymous said...

A misfortune daughter. Sorry didn't intend to spam. Hopefully, our children won't turn out like her.

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